I Heart You, Georgia

Posted on by Beth Hull

I haven’t yet reviewed an entire series on this blog, but it’s slooooow going through my current (snooty-sounding) read, The Grand Permission: New Writings on Poetics and Motherhood, so I’m stepping back in time here.

Last October, Louise Rennison published the last installment of her Georgia Nicolson series. The one with all the extremely weirdly titled books, the kind that are hard to ask book store associates about over the phone because they keep saying, “What? What? Can you repeat that? Can you spell that? Did you say ‘basoomas’?”

Yes, you did say “basoomas.” This is a series of ten young adult books featuring the hilarious heroine Georgia Nicolson, a young woman with very little tact and poise and very a lot of hormones and hijinks. She blunders her way through manipulating her parents, butchers French and German phrases on a regular basis, has a huge case of potty humor, and alienates her friends and boyfriends with almost amazing regularity.

Georgia’s voice is the absolute best part of the books. The novels are written diary-style (I’m sure there’s an academic term for that kind of novel, but as Georgia would say, “Qu’est-ce que c’est le point?”). Her adoption of French and German phrases, as well as her clique’s slang creations, only add to the humor. Add that to the run-of-the-mill linguistic differences between the US and British lexicons, and you will need the glossary provided at the back of each book. But unlike a textbook glossary, you will enjoy reading it, because Georgia is just as funny there.

The girl has her flaws, though. She’s self-absorbed, disrespectful, and can be cruel to her friends on occasion. She makes bad choices. She buys too tight shoes. She spies on her nemesis, Wet Lindsay. She’s a boyfriend stealer. However, she grows, learns lessons, kisses a bunch of guys, and finally – FINALLY! – figures out the one who is right for her. (The last three books I was practically screaming at her as I read: “It’s ____! Stop messing around, you horny minx!”)

The series goes on a bit longer than it has to, and the last few books end on cliffhangers which is a Big No-No in my House Rules. [I should clarify: The very last book obviously does not end on a cliffhanger.] However, the books are funny, fast reads. Very light. They never fail to cheer me up.

If you’re interested in reading the series, here’s a list of the Georgia books in chronological order (US titles):

1. Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging

2. On the Bright Side, I’m Not the Girlfriend of a Sex God

3. Knocked Out by My Nunga-Nungas

4. Dancing in My Nuddy Pants

5. Away Laughing on a Fast Camel

6. Then He Ate My Boy Entrancers

7. Startled by His Furry Shorts

8. Love is a Many Trousered Thing

9. Stop in the Name of Pants

10. Are These My Basoomas I See Before Me?

For more information on Louise Rennison’s Georgia Nicolson books, you can visit the official website here. Happy reading!

NiFtY Author: Cindy Sample

Posted on by Beth Hull

Cindy Sample doesn’t quite fit the mold for my typical, Not-Famous-Yet author interview. For one, she’s jumped ahead of the rest of us and actually published her book, and two, she’s a romance/mystery writer. She’s also funny – much funnier than I am – so without further blather, here’s the interview!

BH: So, published! How does it feel?

CS:  It feels wonderful.  Sort of like giving birth to my children.  It just took longer.

BH: Tell us a little about your book, Dying for a Date.

CS:  Dying for a Date is a humorous romantic mystery about a single mom who gets talked into joining a matchmaking service called “The Love Club,” the safe alternative to on-line dating. I discuss the trials of dating as a single mom, and throw in a few dead bodies just to keep it entertaining.

BH: Laurel McKay, the heroine in Dying for a Date, sounds funny, charming, and feisty. Is she based on anyone you know in real life?

CS:  There is a slight possibility that my protagonist is based on me twenty years ago.  I was 39 and a newly single working Mom as well.

BH: What was the greatest challenge in finishing Dying for a Date and getting it ready for publication?

CS:   The hardest part was letting it go and knowing I could never revise one more word again.

BH: Can you tell us a little about your path to publication? Did you get an agent first, or did you go directly to a publisher?

CS:  I did get an agent and we had great responses from NY publishers but February 2009 was not a great time to sell a mystery series from a debut author.  I ended up receiving offers from two smaller publishers.  I liked the feedback that I received from the other authors published with L&L Dreamspell and chose to go with them. It’s been a great experience working with my publisher. They did a great job of editing and I love the cover they designed.

BH: Where do you get most of your ideas and inspiration?

CS:  I seem to have an incredibly fertile imagination. Right now I have more plot concepts than I would ever have time to complete in this lifetime. An example would be one time when I was in a spa and they asked if I was allergic to shellfish.  Minutes later I had concocted a plot where I killed someone allergic to shellfish with a seaweed wrap.  Yes, I know I’m kind of strange but they say mystery authors are very well balanced because we just off the people who annoy us on paper.


BH: Are you currently working on another project, or are you focusing more on publicity for Dying for a Date, or something else entirely?

CS:  Right now I’m marketing and writing.  I’ve been planning events all over the 4 county area.  I’ll be visiting several local libraries in the area and giving presentations along with several other authors from Capitol Crimes, the Sacramento chapter of Sisters in Crime.  We’re a group of mystery writers (published and pre-published) as well as mystery fans. I’m also attempting to squeeze in time to complete the sequel, Dying for a Dance, a murder mystery that takes place in the glamorous world of competition ballroom dancing.

BH: Do you have a set writing schedule, or are you more of a “when the mood hits” kind of girl?

CS:  I am a very social person so the most difficult part of writing for me is to sit my butt down in my chair.  What I’ve discovered works best is to block out an entire week and just write.  On those weeks I can start at 8 AM and work until midnight almost every day.  One of my friends refers to my rather unusual technique as binge writing.

BH: Binge writing – I love it. What does your writing workspace look like?

CS:  I have a beautiful office overlooking Folsom Lake.  The walls are crammed with books and photos.  But where I write is usually in the kitchen just because it’s cozy.  Plus it’s closer to my coffeepot.

BH: You’re the first mystery writer I’ve interviewed. Can you share anything that’s unique to the mystery-writing process?

CS:  A friend of mine who has authored over 40 non-fiction books and is working on her first novel says mysteries are by far the most complex books to write. You have to ensure that your clues are subtle yet give the reader the ability to guess who the villain is, along with red herrings to lead them astray.

BH: Who is your favorite author?

CS:   Too many to choose from.  Of the greats I think Leon Uris and James Clavell.  In the mystery/thriller spectrum, I enjoy Michael Connolly, Lisa Scottoline, and Robert Crais. In Women’s fiction Jennifer Crusie, Claire Cook and Jennifer Weiner are my favorites.

BH: How about your favorite book on the writing craft?

CS:   I have two full shelves of books on the craft of writing, particularly mysteries.  I think my favorite is Writing the Breakout Novel by Donald Maass.

BH: I’m already drawing comparisons between your novel and Janet Evanovich’s writing. Have you read her books? What do you think of them?

CS:  I love her Stephanie Plum series, at least most of the books. When I was pitching my book I used the pitch that my protagonist, Laurel McKay, was like Stephanie Plum as a soccer mom.

BH: One of your strengths as a writer is your sense of humor. Do you have any tips for other writers on how to develop humor in their writing?

CS:  For some reason whatever can go wrong normally does go wrong in my life and I learned years ago that the most annoying mishaps can usually be turned into a wonderfully funny anecdote. It’s rare for anything to bother me because I know that it will become an entertaining story down the road. Many writers keep daily journals. If you’re interested in incorporating humor in your work, jot down those things that strike you as funny during the course of a normal day.  You’ll be surprised how much material you end up with.

BH: What is the best advice anyone has given you with regards to your writing?

CS:   The three P’s which are persistence, persistence, persistence. My first version of Dying for a Date was at best, mediocre.  But after taking classes and attending mystery conferences, reading every recommended book on fiction, reading and analyzing the work of my favorite authors, and being persistent with my own numerous revisions, I’m thrilled with the published version.  It is an enormous amount of work to publish a novel but the joy it brings is unparalleled. Follow your passion, be patient, and definitely be persistent.

It sounds like there are two alternate P’s there: passion and patience.

Thank you so much, Cindy, for joining me for an interview. Free t-shirts to the studio audience! (Um, there is no studio audience. And no t-shirts.)

For more information on Cindy and her writing, as well as Where To Buy Her Book (so cool!), you can visit her website.

Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Pee

Posted on by Beth Hull

Fantasy: The Ever-Suffering Mother sits on the couch with her NEW, BEAUTIFUL, FANCIFIED laptop, typing away at her Great Work of Young Adult Literature, putting on the finishing touches for her PUBLISHER (this is a fantasy, after all. Indulge me). As she types, she listens to the sweetest sound in the world: “Mamam! I went poop in the potty! I’m going to clean everything up now, wash my hands, and give myself a sticker! Don’t worry about anything. It’s all taken care of!”

The Ever-Suffering Mother sighs contentedly, shifts slightly to accommodate Clarkie, who naps peacefully on the Ever-Suffering Mother’s feet, and calls back, “Nice job, Sweetie! When you’re done, come in here to give me a hug before you finish washing the dishes and mowing the lawn!”

Here is our potty-training lexicon:

  • Go, go, go, go, GO!
  • Poop and pee go in the potty.
  • Tell Mama when you have to go.
  • Big girl underwear!
  • Just like Mommy and Daddy.
  • You may have a sticker after you wash your hands.
  • Good job, Z!

Your potty is covered in stickers. You have pull-up diapers. You even have big-girl underpants with some obscure (to me) cartoon character on them.

You tell me (sometimes) (when it is convenient for putting off bedtime) when you have to go.

So what’s the next step? What’s the next thing for a (lazy, often-inconsistent) mom to do? Am I supposed to keep on keepin’ on? Because if that means “keep on cleaning up pee in Z’s favorite spots in the house,” I don’t know if I’m ready for the Great Potty Training Experience.

Or is that “experiment”?

Everything with you, my precious, willful, sparkling daughter, is an experiment.

The Underneath by Kathi Appelt

Posted on by Beth Hull

Although I read this a couple of months ago, it has stayed with me. The Underneath is so beautifully written, how can it not stay with you? On the surface it is the story of a mother cat, her two kittens, and an old (abused) hound dog who is chained up to a porch in a Louisiana bayou. But it’s also about a mythical snake creature, a family of Native Americans living over a century ago, and the cruel man who is the undeserving owner of the hound.

The “underneath” is the space below the porch, the safe place the mother cat finds to raise her two kittens. Only one curious, adventurous kitten sets into a motion a heart-wrenching story of (a whole bunch of sad stuff) (but ultimately) (redeeming) love.

It’s another one of those books that makes me “feel.” And you know how I feel about those. Highest compliments and praise to the author, but then I need to read some blood-sucking vampire action (with a good dose of either humor or melodrama – both is best) to reaffirm my hope in the world. Sad, isn’t it?

Actually, no, that’s not really true, other than the highest compliments and praise to the author.

**very mild spoiler**

Because this story does reaffirm one’s hope in the world. Maybe not in the middle of the book. The middle has tears, and they are NOT tears of happiness. But hope and love come through in the end, which is more than I can say for Feed. Stupid [ed. Artistic, mind-blowing] book that it is.

But back to my book review. I highly recommend The Underneath. Beautiful, poetic prose and interwoven stories crossing time but all arriving at a single, redemptive space, make the story worth a few tears.

To learn more about Kathi Appelt, visit her website by clicking here.

Viva La Clark!

Posted on by Beth Hull

If you haven’t met Clark, you’re missing out. This interview is my attempt to get as much of the full experience of Clark online as possible. She really is a personality and has adjusted well to inserting herself into our daily activities. For example, just the other day-

Clark: Are you ever going to start my interview?

BH: Yes, Clarkinzie. Just a second. As I was saying, just the other day she hopped from chair to chair –

Clark: The only good thing about this interview so far is you’re sitting down in one place and I can sit on you.

BH: Fine. I’ll ask questions. You answer.

Clark: If I feel like it.

BH: Ahem. How did you first join our family?

Clark: Well, really, if you remember accurately, it was more about you people joining my family. But I only invited you because the man you call Husband offered me bits of muffin on the street.

BH: You’re an indoor cat! What were you doing on the street?!

Clark: Don’t interrupt me. But I’ll humor you. At the time, if you recall, I was enjoying the freedom of napping on the sunny pavement whenever the fancy struck. As I was saying so eloquently before, I invited you into my family. There were conditions, if you recall. Would you like me to recount them?

BH: Can I stop you?

Clark: The basic requirement was that you feed me good things. The muffins disappeared, and I will go on a sleep strike if you don’t bring them back. Another requirement was that you allow me to sleep on your heads. There was a  hiccup in your end of the bargain when that ghastly creature [ed. darling Z] was born and my whole world crumbled around me [ed. we all had to make adjustments]. Now, however, I’ve reclaimed my place at your faces, at least when that thing [little Z] isn’t kicking us all out of the Family Bed (Of Pain). There are further requirements, but listing them all would cause the world’s internet system to crash from all the information.

BH: Tell me about your relationship with fruit snack wrappers.

Clark: They crinkle. They roll. They bounce. They skid across the hardwood floor and collect all those dust bunnies you’re too lazy to clean up [ed. that, despite all of your hard work, appear out of nowhere]. What’s not to love?

BH: How do you really feel about your dry cat food?

Clark: If the huge amount left in the bottom of the bowl every day is any indication at all, you wouldn’t need to ask that question. Although it is organic because you’re extremely paranoid after the pet food (and rightly so – we don’t want to take any risks with my health) scare of 2008, it still tastes like _____ [ed. This is a PG-13 rated website].

BH: What’s your favorite part of the day?

Clark: It’s a tie between the canned chicken coming out of the refrigerator, and when that noisy little cat-chaser [ed. spirited munchkin] takes her nap.

BH: What’s your favorite place?

Clark: Since you so cruelly refuse to allow me outdoors and into the street where I may nap [ed. and risk getting run over], [ed. and kill songbirds], I have to satisfy myself with sleeping on any part of your body that is still for at least one minute. If the blanket comes out, I am certain of victory. If you’re sitting at the table eating, or at this infernal computer typing, certain victory again. Barring a spot on an actual slave [ed. human], I will often curl up in the papasan chair or in the south-facing bay window in the bathroom.

BH: Thank you, Clark, for agreeing to this interview. To our studio audience, if you’d like more Clark, you can view a previous post: The Unsung Clarkie Underfoot. Clark, is there anything else you’d like to say?

Clark: It’s time for you to stop typing so you can pet me.